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Griefyard Works
A man stands on a cliff above a bay as the sun sets.

Male survivor hub

Men canbe survivors.

Men experience trauma, grief, abuse and loss in every country. Most were taught to carry it quietly. This is where that stops.

Everything here

A living wall.

  • CampaignBreak the stigma

    Men can be victims.

    Sexual and intimate partner violence against men is common, underreported, and too often met with disbelief.

    Men

  • Start here

    I don't know if what happened counts.

    You do not need a name for it. Answer a few questions, and nothing is stored.

    Trauma

  • CourseOpen now

    Why you do it this way

    Why you have been fixing things, working, and sorting rather than talking. Why that is a recognized pattern, not a failure, and what it does well and badly.

    Free4 modules, 48 minutesGrief

  • LibraryExplainer

    What trauma actually means

    Not a word for weak people. A word for what happens when something overwhelms what a person can take in.

    1 minute readTrauma

  • ProgramForming now

    Men Don't Have to Disappear

    Male survivor education and support initiative.

    FreeOnlineMen

  • PodcastComing soon

    The Lighthouse Is On

    A Griefyard Works podcast. Long conversations about the things men were taught not to say. Coming soon.

    Men

  • LibraryField note

    When it happened years ago and still feels close

    Time does not always put distance between you and what happened. Why, and what can help.

    1 minute readTrauma

  • StoryShare yours

    Stories from the water.

    Told in writing, on a call, or on the podcast. Nothing is published until you approve the final version, and you can withdraw it at any time.

    Men

  • CourseBeing written

    Anger, and what is under it

    Why it comes out as rage and shortness rather than sadness. How to tell ordinary irritability from something that needs a doctor, and what to say when you call.

    Free4 modulesMental health

  • SignalNewsletter

    Signals from Shore

    One thoughtful email. Essays, tools, resources and field notes.

    Men

  • CampaignBreak the stigma

    Men don't have to disappear.

    Withdrawal, overwork, anger and numbness are how pain often shows up in men. Disappearing is not the same as coping.

    Men

  • Start here

    Help where I live.

    Crisis lines and services, country by country. We never detect your location.

    Men

  • CourseOpen now

    For the men around him

    For a friend, brother, son, or colleague of a man who is going through it. What to say, what not to, how to offer something concrete, and how to tell when it has become medical.

    Free4 modules, 38 minutesMen

  • LibraryField note

    Numb is not the same as fine

    Feeling nothing can be a sign you are carrying a lot. How to tell the difference.

    1 minute readTrauma

  • ProgramOpen

    The Quiet Room

    Small digital conversations and guided discussions.

    FreeOnline groupsLoneliness

  • LibraryExplainer

    Anger after trauma

    When you are short with everyone and do not know why. Where anger often comes from, and what to do with it.

    1 minute readTrauma

  • CourseBeing written

    After the relationship

    Rebuilding after a relationship ends, including one that was controlling or unsafe. Practical, honest, and written for men as well as everyone else.

    $194 modulesRelationships

  • LibraryExplainer

    Shame is not the same as guilt

    Guilt says I did something bad. Shame says I am bad. Why the difference matters after trauma.

    1 minute readTrauma

  • CampaignBreak the stigma

    Men can talk about sexual assault.

    It happens to men and boys. It is never deserved, and physical arousal is not consent.

    Men

  • LibraryExplainer

    Freezing was not a choice

    Why so many people could not move, shout or fight back, and why that was the body protecting you.

    1 minute readTrauma

  • LibraryHeavy subject

    Drinking to get through it

    When alcohol or something else becomes the way to switch off. A plain look at what is happening.

    1 minute readTrauma

  • CampaignBreak the stigma

    Men can leave.

    Abuse from a partner is not limited by gender or orientation. Neither is the right to be safe.

    Men

  • LibraryHeavy subject

    Trauma in childhood, felt as an adult

    What happened when you were young can shape how you live now. Some of the ways, and what helps.

    1 minute readTrauma

  • LibraryExplainer

    Grief does not follow stages

    Why the idea of neat stages leaves so many people feeling they are doing it wrong.

    1 minute readGrief

  • LibraryExplainer

    Grieving by doing

    If you are fixing, working and sorting instead of talking, that is a recognised way to grieve.

    1 minute readGrief

  • LibraryExplainer

    Grief and anger

    Being furious at the person who died, at doctors, at God, at everyone. Why it happens.

    1 minute readGrief

  • LibraryField note

    Losing a parent as an adult

    When you become the older generation, and people expect you to cope.

    1 minute readGrief

  • LibraryExplainer

    When you shut down in arguments

    Going silent, walking away, feeling nothing. Why it happens and what helps.

    1 minute readRelationships

  • LibraryHeavy subject

    Sex after trauma

    When intimacy is complicated by what happened before.

    1 minute readRelationships

  • LibraryScript

    Telling a partner about your past

    Whether, when and how to share what happened to you.

    1 minute readRelationships

  • LibraryField note

    Friendship for men

    Why many men have fewer close friends than they want, and how to change it.

    1 minute readRelationships

  • LibraryScript

    Asking for what you need

    Simple words for something many people find hard.

    1 minute readRelationships

  • LibraryField note

    Relationships after prison or service

    Reconnecting with a partner and family after long time apart.

    1 minute readRelationships

  • LibraryExplainer

    Men experience domestic abuse too

    Why it happens, why it is hidden, and why it is not your fault.

    1 minute readDomestic violence

  • LibraryHeavy subject

    Sexual abuse in relationships

    Consent still matters when you are together.

    1 minute readDomestic violence

  • LibraryHeavy subject

    If you are thinking about suicide

    Please read this. You do not have to act on these thoughts.

    1 minute readMental health

  • LibraryExplainer

    Burnout

    When you are running on empty and cannot recover.

    1 minute readMental health

  • LibraryPractical guide

    Starting therapy: what to expect

    First sessions, how it works, and how to know if it is right.

    1 minute readMental health

  • LibraryExplainer

    Eating problems in men

    Disordered eating is not only a women's issue.

    1 minute readMental health

  • LibraryPractical guide

    Mental health at work

    Talking to your employer, and protecting yourself.

    1 minute readMental health

  • LibraryField note

    Mental health in young men

    Pressures, risks and what helps.

    1 minute readMental health

  • LibraryField note

    Mental health in older men

    Retirement, loss and loneliness later in life.

    1 minute readMental health

  • LibraryExplainer

    Drugs, alcohol and mental health

    How substances and mood affect each other.

    1 minute readMental health

  • LibraryField note

    Chemsex and support

    When sex and drugs become linked.

    1 minute readLGBTQ+

  • LibraryPractical guide

    Workplace discrimination

    When you face hostility at work for being LGBTQ+.

    1 minute readLGBTQ+

  • LibraryField note

    LGBTQ+ men and loneliness

    Community can be full of people and still feel lonely.

    1 minute readLGBTQ+

  • LibraryChecklist

    The first thirty days of starting over

    A gentle plan for when everything has changed.

    1 minute readStarting over

  • LibraryPractical guide

    Starting over after prison

    Practical and emotional steps after release.

    1 minute readStarting over

  • LibraryPractical guide

    Finding work after a gap

    Explaining time away and getting back in.

    1 minute readStarting over

  • LibraryField note

    Starting over after addiction

    Recovery and building a new life.

    1 minute readStarting over

  • LibraryPractical guide

    Making friends as an adult

    It is harder than it was at school. Here is how.

    1 minute readStarting over

  • LibraryField note

    Retirement as a fresh start

    Making the most of the next chapter.

    1 minute readStarting over

  • LibraryField note

    Getting your confidence back

    After something knocked you down.

    1 minute readStarting over

  • LibraryPractical guide

    Single parenting suddenly

    When you become the main parent overnight.

    1 minute readStarting over

  • LibraryExplainer

    Sofa surfing

    Staying with friends is homelessness too.

    1 minute readHousing

  • LibraryPractical guide

    Rough sleeping and health

    Looking after yourself while sleeping outside.

    1 minute readHousing

  • LibraryPractical guide

    Veterans and housing

    Help for people leaving service.

    1 minute readHousing

  • LibraryPractical guide

    Housing after prison

    Finding somewhere to live after release.

    1 minute readHousing

  • LibraryPractical guide

    Yes, men can be sexually assaulted

    The myths male survivors hear most, and what is actually true.

    1 minute readMen

  • LibraryPractical guide

    When the abuse comes from a partner and you are a man

    Coercive control, violence and threats do not care about gender. What it can look like, and what to do.

    1 minute readMen

  • LibraryField note

    I don't know if what happened counts

    You do not need a name for it before you are allowed to take it seriously.

    1 minute readTrauma

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