Asking for what you need

Many people expect partners to guess what they need. Few can.

Why it is hard

• Fear of seeming needy or weak
• Being taught your needs do not matter
• Not knowing what you need

Find it first

Ask yourself: what would help right now? More time together? Less? Help with chores? A hug? Space?

Words to try

• "I have had a hard day. Can we just sit together for a bit?"
• "I need some time alone this evening. It is not about you."
• "It would really help me if you could take the kids on Saturday morning."

Asking is not demanding

Your partner can say no. Asking clearly still makes life easier for both of you.