Grief in a family that does not talk about feelings

In some families, nobody cries in front of others. The funeral happens, the sandwiches are served, and then nobody mentions the person again.

Why families do this

Often it is a way of protecting each other. If I do not mention it, I will not upset you. Over time, that can leave everyone grieving alone in the same house.

Small openings

• Say the person's name in a normal conversation
• Share one memory
• Ask a simple question: "Do you think about Dad much?"
• Put up a photo

You can grieve differently

You do not need your family's permission to grieve in your own way. You can find people outside the family to talk to if home is not the place.

Sometimes one person going first gives everyone else permission.