The Library
Field noteGriefFamilyMen1 minute read
Losing a parent as an adult
When you become the older generation, and people expect you to cope.
People often think losing a parent as an adult is natural, and so it should be easier. It can still knock you sideways.
What is lost
- Someone who knew you all your life
- A link to your childhood and family history
- Advice, approval, or the hope of getting them one day
- The sense of someone older standing between you and death
Complicated relationships
If your relationship was difficult, grief can be tangled with relief, anger, or regret for what never was. That is normal. You can grieve the parent you had and the parent you wished you had.
Practical weight
Adult children often handle funerals, estates, and a surviving parent's needs, while working and raising children. It is a lot. Ask for help and share tasks with siblings or friends where you can.
There is no age at which losing a parent stops mattering.
