The Library
Field noteGriefRelationships1 minute read
Grief after a breakup
When the person is still alive but the life you had together is gone.
People do not always treat a breakup as a loss. But it is one. You lose a person, a routine, a home sometimes, friends, plans, and a version of yourself.
Why it can hurt so much
- You lose the person you would usually turn to when things are hard
- Reminders are everywhere
- There may be anger, rejection or betrayal mixed in
- Friends and family may expect you to bounce back
Things that help
- Let yourself grieve, even if you chose to leave
- Reduce contact for a while if you can, including online
- Keep some structure: sleep, food, movement
- Spend time with people who make you feel like yourself
When there are children
You still have to co parent while grieving. Keep conversations about practical matters. Get support for yourself separately.
The course After the relationship is being written for exactly this.
