Field noteStarting over Grief1 minute read

Letting go of who you were

Grieving an old version of yourself.

Sometimes starting over means accepting that you are not the person you used to be. The athlete who is injured. The provider who lost his job. The husband who is now single. The person who was confident before something happened.

This is grief too

Letting go of an old identity is a loss. It is normal to feel sadness, anger or denial.

What helps

Name what you miss about who you were
Notice what you still carry: your values, humour, skills, the people who love you
Try small new things to discover who you are becoming
Be patient. Identity forms slowly

A different question

Instead of asking how to get back to who you were, ask who you want to be now.

KEEP EXPLORING

Keep exploring.

Everything

CourseOpen now

The first ninety days

What actually has to be handled, in what order, and what can wait. Nothing in it about feelings, which is exactly why it works.

Free3 modules, 33 minutesGrief
LibraryChecklist

The first week after a death

What usually needs doing, and what can wait.

1 minute readGrief
ProgramForming now

The Anchor Program

Short term stabilization and planning for what comes next.

FreeOnline, one to oneTrauma
LibraryPractical guide

Grief at work

Going back, what to say, and what you do not owe anyone.

1 minute readGrief
ToolFree sheet

The first ninety days

What has to be handled after a death, a separation, or a release, in the order it has to be handled.

Thirty minutes to read, then a few minutes a dayStarting over
CourseOpen now

Why you do it this way

Why you have been fixing things, working, and sorting rather than talking. Why that is a recognized pattern, not a failure, and what it does well and badly.

Free4 modules, 48 minutesGrief
LibraryField note

When a relationship ends and you did not see it coming

Shock, questions, and getting through the first weeks.

1 minute readRelationships
CourseBeing written

Carrying it at work

Going back. What to tell people and what you are not obliged to say. Working on four hours of sleep, in a job that requires you to be fine.

Free4 modulesGrief
LibraryField note

Learning to live alone

After a breakup, bereavement or leaving home.

1 minute readStarting over