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Practical guideRelationshipsTrauma1 minute read
When your partner has been through trauma
How to support someone without losing yourself.
Loving someone who has been through trauma can be rewarding and hard.
What you might notice
- They startle easily or are always on guard
- They pull away or shut down
- Some places, sounds or touches upset them
- Sleep is difficult
- Anger or fear shows up out of nowhere
What helps
- Believe them
- Let them control how much they share
- Ask what helps rather than guessing
- Do not take every reaction personally
- Keep daily life steady and predictable
Look after yourself
You cannot be someone's only support. Encourage them to get help, and get support for yourself as well. Your needs matter too.
Safety first
Trauma explains behaviour. It does not excuse harm. If you are being hurt or frightened, your safety comes first.
